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Sinus Pressure In Teeth

I know this sounds gross but I have real trouble remembering to clean my teeth. When I was younger it was never encouraged by my parents. Then when I got a bit older & my dentist began to berate my mother for the state of my mouth, she began amature dentistry. She would clean my teeth herself, frequently prying ones she thought werent beneficial enough out with general tools & chipping away at tartar without pausing to let me spit out the blood. Obviously it was excruciating & its left me with a fear of cleaning my teeth. It appears illogical, I know. But touching my teeth constantly reminds me of when she did these issues to me, & Im also afraid that shell hear me cleaning them & want to inspect them herself, which could lead to an additional session. Please, can you believe of any way I can get into a additional typical cleaning routine? My oral hygine is very poor, & it wants to enhance badly, but I cant motivate myself well because of these fears & for the reason that it isnt a habit for me so I often forget. I only seem to clean them when my mother isnt around or prior to I need to leave the home sometimes. Im not trolling, any advice would be so appreciated. Thanks.

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